Loshon Hora

Loshon Hora (evil tongue) is lately getting me really nervous. This might have to do with the fact that I’m guilty of this grave sin myself and therefore I am self-conscious about it. Or, if you want to quote the Baal Shem Tov, “the bad one sees in others always traces itself back to oneself.” 

I waited until after Tishrei – so as not to speak ill of others before the days of judgment. 

It’s not the sin aspect, the aveira-transgression stuff that really worries me (Although that in itself is huge!). The part that really gets to me is the after-effects to the person or group being spoken about. I recently heard someone say that it would be hard for a frum Jew to be a good comedian, because most good jokes are putting others down. 

There is an anecdote that the Chafetz Chaim sent one of his students to the Rebbe Rashab (5th Lubavitcher Rebbe) to get a haskama-approval for his famous “Chofetz Chaim” manuscript on the laws of loshon hora. The Rebbe Rashab supposedly responded: “In Chabad we work on not even thinking loshon hora”(1). 

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Now all my Chabad readers are hopefully happy. No thinking loshon hora! We love all Jews (as long as you love us back). The 32nd chapter of the Tanya, the “lev” of Chabad Chassidus (the numerology of 32 is lamed-bet, spelling “lev,” or heart) is (I’m paraphrasing): “All Jewish souls are one body and when we elevate the body over the soul, it’s easy to love every Jew like oneself [for the body that separates one from another is subservient to the soul]…” So, while we’re working on controlling our thoughts and bodies, it might be a good idea to review a good book on the laws of loshon hora (there are hundreds to choose from). 

I try really hard to keep sarcasm out of my writing, but it does sometimes sneak in. I don’t have complete mind over body control. Or mind over mouth… 

(1). A similar story is told that the Chofetz Chaim asked the Rebbe Rashab why Chassidim make a big deal about not cutting their beard but not about loshon hora. The Rebbe Rashab supposedly answered that cutting a beard is a calculated act, as opposed to loshon hora, which is usually an accident.

The Rebbe’s take on taking a vacation

Over the last couple of years I have read a number of volumes of the Rebbe’s letters (recorded in over 40 volumes – most of his letters have not been printed yet).  One of the many benefits of reading the letters, is my getting a better sense of the Rebbe’s opinions in one-on-one related issues.  

The Rebbe delivered 10’s of thousands of public talks including directives and ideas for the masses.  The issue I often have is how to implement the many diverse ideas on a practical level.

In the public sphere the Rebbe often generalized, but in the individual letters you see his wisdom on a more personalized level. 

Why do I bring this up now?  The summer is a time for vacation and after Labor day I think according to all shitos vacation is over.  

The Fridiker Rebbe often took time off to just relax.  You see many pictures of him kind of taking it easy in a big nice chair with a cigarette etc.  There are many pictures of Gedolim going to the country smiling and relaxing in the field.  I recently heard that some chassidim ‘caught’ two big Rebbe’s with their feet up drinking beer (I won’t say who).

With the Rebbe you did not see this at all.  He made many statements especially in the 80’s and early 90’s that we can’t take off even a second.  We “need to go crazy and help every Jew, and bring Moshiach NOW!”  He himself slept precious little maybe 3-4 hours a night into his 90’s.   He did not stop for a second.  He told his wife that a 2 minute break he took looking out the window was enough for his to be ‘yotzei’ vacation for a of couple years.  He stood for thousands of hours talking to yiddin, teaching and learning NON STOP.  Pick up any sicha of the Rebbe and after reading one paragraph and you will see what I mean.

Yet in the Rebbe’s letters you see a much lighter tone.  He is writing to the individual.  

He writes to a student that taking a break from learning is a mitzvah.  He writes to a husband that he shouldn’t stay at shul 

on Shabbos davening too long, he needs to spend the time with his family at home.  He writes to the teacher that from his letter it seems he’s getting burned out, telling him that maybe he isn’t being paid enough.  On and on.

I hope you all enjoyed your summer vacations.